Computer Stupidities

Tech Support: "Well, just go to [URL]."
Customer: "How do I do that?"
Tech Support: "Type it in in your web browser."
Customer: "Huh?"
Tech Support: "Ok...sir...do you have Internet access?"
Customer: "Huh? No. No Internet. I don't even have a computer."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir, you need a computer and an Internet account to access web sites."
Customer: "Oh. Well, it didn't say that when I mailed in the membership card. I want my money back."

Loyalty - A real story

In this first post of this spring, let me tell you a small story.

"There were about 70 scientists working on a very hectic project. All of them were really frustrated due to the pressure of work and the demands of their boss but everyone was loyal to him and did not think of quitting the job.

One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him - Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in our township. So I want to leave the office at 5 30 pm.

His boss replied "OK, You're permitted to leave the office early today" The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch. As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch when he felt he was close to completion. The time was 8.30 PM. Suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children.

He looked for his boss, He was not there. Having told him in the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home. Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children.

He reached home. Children were not there. His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines.

The situation was explosive, any talk would boomerang on him. His wife asked him "Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry.

The man replied "If you would like to have coffee, i too will have but what about Children ??"
Wife replied "You don't know ?? Your manager came here at 5.15 PM and has taken the children to the exhibition "

What had really happened was ... The boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 PM. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit to exhibition.

So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition. The boss does not have to do it every time.
But once it is done, loyalty is established. That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss even though the stress was tremendous.

By the way , can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was..?

He was none other than Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, Ex-President of India."

A couple of my recordings

Hey, this will be the last post for this month. So let me share some of my recordings this time. I have recorded some songs played by me and my guitar. Pretty much weekend timepass stuff, so don't expect gr8 sound quality. For now I have uploaded two songs. None of them are complete versions. Anyways enjoy and tell me if u like it.

1. Every rose has its thorn - Poison

every rose has its...

2. Knockin on heaven's door - Guns n' Roses

knockin on heavens...

Funky Photoes

Roaming around the net, I found a cool website which allows me to create quick and funky effects on photographs. U can upload your photo from your computer or from a URL and apply effects.
See what I have done with one of my photographs.

www.befunky.com

No criminals in politics Campaign

www.nocriminals.org

JOIN THE CAMPAIGN.

• This is a very good and revolutionary campaign that if properly followed, will change the course of indian politics.
• On this website you will be able to browse through all the data available about all the candidates for current Lok Sabha elections.
• The educational qualifications and all the criminal charges assoiciated with a candidate is listed in detail.
• This is where you will get the lowdown on all the criminals turned politicians or vice versa.
• Every voter has a right to know about the candidates.
• Come on people lets vote for good purpose this time and show them the power of democracy.
  

Spread the word through your blogs, e-mail and other social networking sites.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.

“And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson ponders for a minute. “Well,

Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.

Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.

Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe.

But what does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes is silent for a moment.

“Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”

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Engineering Terminologies

1. A number of different approaches are being tried.

(We don't know where we're going, but we're moving.)

2. Close project coordination.

(We should have asked someone else.)

3. An extensive report is being prepared on a fresh approach to the problem.

(We just hired 3 guys. We'll let them kick it around for a while.)

4. Major technological breakthrough.

(Back to the drawing board.)

5. Customer satisfaction believed assured.

(We're so far behind schedule that the customer is happy to get anything at all from us.)

6. Preliminary operational test were inconclusive.

(The darn thing blew up when we threw the switch!)

7. The test results were extremely gratifying.

(It works and boy are we surprised.)

8. The entire concept will have to be abandoned.

(The only guy who understood the thing quit.)

9. It is in the process.

(It is so wrapped up in red tape that the situation is almost hopeless.)

10. We will look into it.

(By the time the wheel makes a full turn, we will assume you have forgotten about it.)

11. Please note and initial.

(Let's spread the responsibility for this job.)

12. Give us the benefit of your thinking.

(We'll listen to what you have to say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we have already done.)

13. Give us your interpretation.

(Your warped opinion will be pitted against our good sense.)

14. See me, or Let's discuss.

(Come down to my office, I'm lonesome.)

15. All new.

(Parts not interchangeable with previous design.)

16. Rugged.

(Too heavy to lift.)

17. Lightweight.

(Lighter than rugged.)

18. Years of development.

(Finally got one that worked.)

19. Energy saving.

(Achieved when the power switch is off.)

20. No maintenance.

(Impossible to fix!)

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